Posts Tagged ‘married life’

Isteri berdikari suami tidak hilang maruah diri

Suami saya, arwah abahnya meninggal dunia ketika dia berusia 5 tahun, waktu itu adik bongsunya cuma berusia beberapa hari. Kemudian mereka dibesarkan oleh seorang emak yang tabah dan hebat.

Kita seringkali disogok dengan cerita bahawa orang lelaki suka sekiranya wanita bergantung pada dia. Namun jika lelaki tersebut insaf dan sedar bahawa dunia ini pinjaman, dirinya pinjaman kepada isteri, isteri dan anak-anak pinjaman kepada dia, dia akan memberi ruang yang sepatutnya kepada isteri dan anak-anak untuk meningkatkan kualiti diri supaya dapat berdikari tanpa sedikitpun merasa bahawa keberdikarian mereka akan merendahkan egonya sebagai suami dan bapa. Kerana sudah termaktub adat meminjam, sampai masa akan diambil semula. Jika ditakdirkan tempoh pinjamannya tamat lebih awal, sekurang-kurangnya isteri dan anak-anaknya tahu apa yang perlu dilakukan demi kelangsungan hidup.

Kaum wanita pula, sentiasalah berazam untuk memperbaiki kualiti dan kemahiran diri, jika kurang menyerlah dalam pelajaran, mungkin boleh mencuba bidang masakan, jahitan, jualan dll. Memang suami tempat bergantung, tapi selitkan juga ruang untuk mempersiapkan diri menghadapi kemungkinan-kemungkinan tidak terduga. Senangkan hati suami dengan membuktikan bahawa kita boleh berdikari sekiranya dia diambil lebih awal. Tidaklah hatinya risau sehingga dia lupa tentang pinjaman nyawa yang Allah beri dan menganggap dirinya hak milik, penyara dan penanggung mutlak isteri dan anak-anaknya.

Jika suami sekadar menjalankan urusan menyara dan menyediakan kelengkapan keluarga sebagai tugasan wajib tanpa nilai ibadah, rumah tangga akan jadi kehidupan yang hambar. Keluar pagi balik petang yang diulang hari demi hari sampai mati. Para isteri jika bangun pagi cuma berazam untuk shopping besar-besaran duit suami segeralah muhasabah diri. Juga wanita bujang yang tergetnya cuma untuk mengahwini lelaki kaya supaya kelak boleh hidup senang goyang kaki, istighfarlah. Ini bermakna hidup sudah sedikit lari daripada tujuan asal yang Allah cipta.

Sentiasalah mulakan setiap hari baru yang Allah masih berikan nikmat hidup dengan pemikiran dan perbuatan yang menjangkau akhirat, bukan sekadar untuk hidup dunia semata-mata.

Dari hati seorang ibu

Anakku semakin hari semakin membesar, kehadirannya ke dalam hidupku menyejukkan hati, namun kadangkala kerenahnya menuntut tenaga dan kesabaran yang bukan sedikit. Kadang dia bertempik mahu itu mahu ini, kadang dia punggah semula pakaian yang baru aku lipat, hanya beberapa saat setelah aku selesaikan segala tugas melipat. Jangan ditanya tentang memunggah barang-barang dari dapur, dialah hero. Dengan kelajuannya dalam bab ‘menyusun’ dan mencuba satu persatu kasut di rak kasut, mengambil dan membuka semua buku di rak buku, bukan sahaja buku-bukunya bahkan juga buku pelajaranku serta keletah lainnya yang tak mampu aku catatkan satu persatu. Semuanya bergantung untuk diuruskan oleh seorang manusia yang menyandang gelar ibu. Dan orang itu adalah aku. Mommynya.Selain dibantu oleh suamiku.

Ramai orang bertanya tidak letihkah aku menjadi ibu dan isteri pada usia ini? Menguruskan rumah tangga saat rakan-rakan seusia yang bujang berhibur bergembira keluar bersama, menjaga dan mendidik anak saat aku sendiri masih dikekang segala tugasan laim. Sementelah dengan keadaan kami sekeluarga yang bermusafir jauh dari keluarga, maka tanggungjawabku juga menjadi berganda. Jawab aku tidak. Aku tidak letih. Tiada apa yang membosankan apatah lagi untuk dikesali dengan menjadi isteri dan ibu pada usia ini. Waktu aku menimbal keputusan untuk bernikah beberapa tahun lalu sewaktu aku hanya berusia 18 tahun, tiada siapa yang memaksa aku untuk berkata ya dengan taklifan sebagai isteri. Sewaktu aku menyatakan kesediaan untuk menimang cahaya mata dahulu juga tiada siapa pernah memaksa aku untuk bersetuju. Bahkan suami, ayah dan ibuku juga banyak kali memberi peringatan tentang usiaku dan tanggungjawab berganda yang bakal aku galasi sebagai pelajar isteri dan ibu namun semuanya aku hadam sebagai sebahagian daripada perjalanan hidupku.

Setiap kali aku ingin merungut tentang keletihanku, saat Aqeef Afwan membuat perangai yang ‘sedikit luar biasa’ seringkali aku ingatkan kembali pada diri sendiri bahawa tiada sesiapa pernah memaksa aku untuk mengandung dan melahirkan ‘permata syurga’ bernama Aqeef Afwan ini dahulu. Semuanya pilihanku sendiri. Aqeef Afwan adalah amanah Allah buatku. Dan lazimlah di dalam usia ini, satu tahun 3 bulan lebih sedikit ini, dia semakin lasak, semakin banyak perkara ingin dicuba dan semakin besar suaranya. Lebih-lebih lagi dia seorang anak lelaki.

Maka akulah manusia yang harus menyediakan hati, jiwa dan jasadku dengan ketabahan dan kekuatan yang semaksima mungkin. Kerana aku seorang ibu. Seorang mommy kepada seorang permata syurga. Pemikul amanah yang dititip Allah. Jika culas aku, maka buruklah natijahnya kelak dan hampirlah aku ke neraka, nauzubillah min zalik. Jika elok didikanku, elok dewasa anak-anakku dengan akhlak dan iman yang seganding Islam, maka dekatlah aku ke syurga, insya Allah. Semoga kehadiran Aqeef Afwan dan zuriatku yang lain kelak semakin mendekatkan aku kepada syurgaNya.amiin.

After a hiatus

A month and almost half of going back to Malaysia, just two of me and Aqeef without abang I can still feel the incomplete atmosphere hovering around but alhamdulillah that presence of my family is a big miracle indeed. Aqeef adapting quite slowly. From a rarely flu catcher, he was very ill last week that we had to send him to hospital after a week of fever. Most people including my full of experience ma said that Aqeef is missing his daddy very badly. I wont tell others but me too. It’s impossible to not missing him especially when we are away from each other. I told abang about this and abang said, ‘takpe HALAL’. Haha. That’s how abang handles problem that comes around. Even I know deep in his heart he is missing us, especially Aqeef. He said sometimes he feels like crying seeing Aqeef’s things around the house. And I reply I cry when I see Aqeef’s face because he has a very large amount of daddy’s look.

I was on a hiatus for quite long. Reason? (10 marks)

  • These previous months I hate anything related to internet, computer and any other gadget. I feel dizzy each time I try to use them. Some know why, but iI would like to keep this reason secret for a while.
  • I was very busy with my holiday. We haven’t go back to Malaysia almost 9 months so this time it is a big thing even it is quite incomplete without abang.
  • I spend everyday of my holiday eating everything I craved for when I was at London. So much time spend for food, less time for anything else.
  • I want to spend more time to see Aqeef grows up. He is 1 year and 1 month old now. With every day passes quickly I feel that it is an injustice for him to share my time doing something else more than to look after him.
  • I am an easily irritated person now. I get bored and hate people unexpectedly. To avoid being cruel and collecting more sin I thought it was better for me to take a break from internet . But don’t worry I think now I am cured slowly.

And after all this is for abang. He misses to read this blog and keep asking me to write something.

Happy belated birthday for these two apples of my eyes. Without both of you I can’t imagine how colorless my life would be. They both got a year older on last 24th and 25th February (and yes they have almost the same birthday date). I was not so well for the pass few months so I guess this is to repay my late wishes. But we had celebrated these double birthday as a family few days before me and Aqeef went back to Malaysia. Alhamdulillah for the bounty of love Allah bestows among us, we are still together as a happy family.

M&M’s World London

I read so many review about this place, it is a big three floors gallery cum shop of M&M’s chocolate near Leicester Square, within a walking distance to Trafalgar Square. Due to daddy’s hectic schedule, we were hold in a promise to go there since last few weeks and finally went there today. It was weekend so there were too many people. The place was so crowded and to add my diziness was Aqeef that wanted to touch everything because they are so colourful and seducing. At some sections we just couldn’t wait in the long lines anymore that we skipped few interesting photography points. As said, they are photography points so they are made really for photography purpose, that’s why so many people were in queue. We just managed to take picture at few places that were not too crowd.

The reason of bringing Aqeef there is too stimulate Aqeef’s mind with some interactive colourful game but we forgot to bring Aqeef’s shoes, so we couldn’t let him play on the floor (poor him) but it was very lucky that we forgot actually. I am dead sure that if we brought his shoes and let him walk and play on floor, he might do something extraordinary e.g: wipe the floor using his hands or help to polish people’s shoes. So to make our visit stay safe, we better not too let him walk by himself. Furthermore there are too many M&M souvenir sold there. Most of them made of glass. I dare not to let Aqeef makes my husband pay some amends to the store.So I won’t write any longer, we should see some pics.


Aqeef and daddy studying the M&M periodic table. I hope one day Aqeef can be a muslim alchemist or muslim scientist and win nobel prize in Chemistry because in the history there are not so many muslim nobel prize laureate ever yet. Insya Allah.


Periodic table. Siapa hafal ni mesti dapat M+ for chemistry paper.

Family of three going to be five soon, insya Allah. Four? Ehem we might accidentally skipped that.


M&M’s picnic. Look at Aqeef, excitedly trying to join the picnic.


I tried to carry Aqeef daddy’s style, but it just stand for 2-3 minutes. Aqeef is way too big and heavy now. I can’t carry him longer that 5 minutes.


Fancy joining my friends behind picnic?


Daddy tried hard to persuade me to buy Aqeef green rompers behind but I really didn’t fall into it. Rompers suit small baby nicely, but perhaps not for a going to be one year old toddler like Aqeef.


Daddy said the giant M&M behind was trying to ‘sepuk’ Aqeef’s head.


Aqeef tried to jump into the toy basket. But daddy stopped him. You can see how unsatisfied his face was.


Again, family of three ♥


Yummy yellow knight, fierce on the outside but rich with chocolate inside.


Green princess. Actually her skirt has a big opening in front, showing her leap.Daddy initially didn’t allow us to take picture with this princess because daddy said she is too sexy but you see, I was good at hiding it. You can’t see it, don’t you?


At the back door, after we went out. The front door was too crowded, so we ran to the back door to have a proof picture of our visit.Erk Aqeef was having his milk. Too thirsty of greeting people inside the shop.


Sideshow> London Chinatown. There was a lion dance for Chinese New Year at the back, under the tanglungs but there were too many people there, we had to go without glancing it because we obviously had no chance to slip into the crowd of big english people there.And yes there were not too many Chinese there, the audience mostly were english.

Alhamdulillah still given the chance by Allah to live as a family and to have a good time together.May we all be blessed with Allah’s love and guidance.

It was my birthday

Last week, Friday was my birthday. Nothing special for me, birthday means an addition to the number of my age, and to act carefully as a maturer person. So everything went as usual, also, to fulfill my gedikness, I did restricted my birthday showed in my fb profile, so only those who remembered did come dropped a wish. Actually I just forgot to unrestricted it back a day before my birthday. On my birthday, I realised, tapi dah malu nak buat correction huhu, so there went my un-fb-birthday.

But I did received few wishes, from my family, my husband, and some friends. Thank you very much.

As my birthday fell on winter, so there was no outing, it’s too cold, I prefer to stay at home after school.

So that night, abang came home quite late. I already knew that this thing would happened, it just waited for the right time, because abang had several times ‘terlepas cakap’ to celebrate my birthday his way. So he came home brought all he did said. Everything suppose a birthday girl receives, a small chocolate cake (enough for 3), a birthday card, and an Ipad 2 (ok this is not every birthday girl’s)


Abang chose pink for everything, the card, the Ipad 2 cover, as if I am really a pink addict. I am not so actually.


Except for the word worship, everything was perfect!


Suamiku yang gigih mengambil cop tangan bayinya. I know how hard it took, because knowing Aqeef to get his palm stamp is harder than to get Maher Zain’s autograph. His hand never sleep!


The Ipad 2, inclusive Aqeef’s camwhore as wallpaper.Thank you abang.


Time ni baby ni merajuk dah sebab lama duduk atas booster seat tapi mommy belum bagi kek lagi.


Dapat kek terus senyap. He knows that before eating he has to recite prayer, but he has no idea that we should not eat using both left and right hands.

So thank you abang for celebrating my birthday, thank you Aqeef for coming into mommy’s life and make it wonderful, thank you to my family and friends for the warm wish, thank you mama for giving birth to me, sacrifice every thing for her stubborn daughter, thank you ayah for rising me up, until I become who I am today and next, and most of all thank you Allah for this bounty of sweet life.Alhamdulillah masih diberi nikmat bernafas di atas dunia.