Sweet Potato

I used to have doubt about having baby girl in my life, might be due to how easy I dealt with Aqeef’s babyhood, no loud crying, no high fever for completely one year, no frequent runny nose and most of all, I have a terrible feeling of those wet diaper and the fussy care for a girl. But then Aminah came. And to my surprise, she is such a good baby, just as good as Aqeef.

She is an incredibly special little girl that has a very special space in my heart. Some people said, it looks obvious that I love Aqeef more, but hey, you dont really know me. You don’t sleep on the same pillow with me, every night. Aminah does. She shares my pillow since months ago. When she decided that she hates her own crib.

She crawls now, and climbs too, it’s hard to say no when she wants to do something moreover when she wears that cheeky smile anyone couldnt resist. And I am her well known famous the one and only ‘victim’ to seek permission to do something adventures.

She is an 8 months old special little girl. I love her for the rest of my life.

So it was a week ago, on February 24, my little boy, Aqeef Afwan’s 2nd birthday. The next day, 25th February, my ‘big boy’ aka daddy aka mr husband aka my hero’s 30′something birthday. We were so happy, I was dreaming of organizing a birthday party for long, and on that very day of Aqeef’s birthday, which fell on Sunday, every thing went smoothly as planned. Alhamdulillah. Because their birthday are just differ by a day, consecutively so daddy was too shy to own up that it was his birthday party too (afraid that people might tease him for having a birthday party at the age of 30 something) so we just said that it was Aqeef’s birthday. I made everything myself, nasi tomato, ayam masak merah, pulut kuning with rendang daging and a black forest cake. Daddy did the party decoration, and Aqeef did the joy. Almost all our Malaysian friends that reside in London came, Aqeef was so happy. He bounced all day long, even forgot to take his evening nap, and forgot to eat too.Aminah had a nice sleep. Knowing Aminah, she loves sleeping in noise, the more the merrier.

We had fun, chatting, sharing stories got to know each other better. Aqeef got presents and was so excited that he couldn’t choose which present was to be unwrap first. He got puzzles, books, musical instrument set, a wagon, slide (from daddy), playhouse from mommy, rocking caterpillar,chocolate, and some other gifts. There is a battery powered tooth brush that he keeps trying to share with me and his sister. Just want to say, thank you everyone for the present and for coming to our son’s birthday party.

Birthday boys, and look at Aminah, adopting someone’s hug to fall asleep in. What an easy baby she is.

Some of our guest. Thank you everyone for coming

Aqeef with some of the presents he got. Was very confuse to choose.

Brother and sister. After the party.

The party decoration, balloons were all nice, arranged by daddy, and still there in my hall until now. Every day Aqeef takes the balloon in and out from his playhouse. About the playhouse, Aminah seems to be very fond with it. She fell asleep in it once. It was so funny to find a little baby sleeps in the playhouse.

And, on that very day too, we received three guests from Egypt, Hanim, Amirah and Anisah. Nice girls, doctors to be. thank you for the souvenirs, very delicious chocolates and warm chatting we had. Akak sedih when you all left huhu, tapi akak faham kamu semua kena balik Mesir sebab cuti dah habis.

Semalam, hajat hati nak masak nasi lemak, sekali dapur pulak rosak. Maklumlah dapur rumah kami jenis tak keluar api, pakai elektrik, ingatkan satu plate je rosak, rupanya semua rosak. Akhirnya, idea kreatif datang. Tanak nasi dalam oven. Tergelak kami suami isteri sebab nasi tu menjadi pulak.Tapi nasi biasa je, malas dah nak bernasi lemak. Nasi je lauk tak masak? Sabar bagilah saya habis cerita dulu. Sambal ikan bilis, sambal ayam dan daging masak kicap campur brokoli dah siap, daddy ‘masak’ di Malaysian hall. Sekali sekala beli lauk luar sebab semalam mommy sibuk tahap gaban.

Malam tu, lepas makan ajak Aqeef tengok gambar keluarga di Malaysia.Aqeef kata “toktok deded” (atuk grand dad)- Aqeef memang kepakaran mencampur bahasa haha. Selak gambar demi gambar, sampailah dekat gambar scanned masa sekolah rendah dulu. Gambar ayah masa hari penyampaian hadiah darjah 5.

Teringat waktu sekolah-sekolah dulu betapa sucinya kasih sayang ayah.

Emak dulu bekerja. Untuk bantu sara kami 8 beradik. Kerja telekom. Kerja shif, kadang-kadang kerja pagi tak sempat buat sarapan untuk anak-anak. pagi-pagi ayah hantar kami pergi sekolah singgah warung jual kuih, dan paksa kami bawa bekal roti canai, nasi lemak, kuih-muih untuk makan di sekolah. Ingat lagi dulu, saya bukanlah peminat nasi lemak untuk makan pagi, apatah lagi kuih keria, tapi sebab dibelikan oleh ayah, maka kuih itu kutelan jua. Sentimental value. Pagi-pagi makan nasi lemak, time belajar tersendawa, aduh pedas tekak. Tapi hampir setiap hari perkara sama kuulang sampai jadi sebati.

Jalan-jalan di fb, ada rakan yang minta didoakan kesihatan abahnya, terlantar di hospital. Hati ni serta merta jadi sayu. Dah dekat 10 bulan tak balik malaysia jumpa ayah, tatap wajah ayah. Allah sedihnya rasa. Bila call ayah dengan emak, emak kata “macam manalah rupa Aminah, nenek dengan atuk tak pernah jumpa Aminah lagi”.Tersiat-siat rasa hati ini. Sedih.

Masa saya mengandungkan Aqeef, ayahlah orang yang paling kerja keras nak sediakan apa-apa yang saya teringin nak makan. Ikhlas hati ayah bukan mainan. Bukan tak pernah orang sakiti hatinya, termasuk saya sendiri pernah berkali-kali menyakiti hatinya. Ayah ajar orang berkawad untuk hari merdeka, tapi bila sampai masa ayah tak dapat apa-apa penghargaan pun. Ayah buat kerja itu ini, bila sampai masa orang lain yang naik pangkat. Ayah tegur bekas guru besar sekolah SKBH kat dalam bank CIMB (masa tu masih Bank Bumiputera kot), cikgu tu, cikgu rahman namanya buat tak tahu je. Macam orang nak rompak dia pulak. Tapi ayah pemaaf sungguh. Tak pernah lokek membantu sesiapapun yang dalam kesusahan. Walaupun orang yang ayah tak kenal, orang di jalanan. Terlampau banyak kebaikan ayah. Tak mampu nak cerita.

Ayah,
Hanya doa mampu kak Farah kirim dari jauh.
Harap ayah sejahtera dan baik-baik sahaja.
Andai murah rezeki kurniaan Allah, tak lama lagi dapatlah kami pulang.

Ya Allah sihatkan ayahku, panjangkan usianya untuk beribadah, untuk lihat anaknya ini berjaya seperti mana harapan ayah selama ini.

oh air mata,
simpanlah dirimu.

A month and almost half of going back to Malaysia, just two of me and Aqeef without abang I can still feel the incomplete atmosphere hovering around but alhamdulillah that presence of my family is a big miracle indeed. Aqeef adapting quite slowly. From a rarely flu catcher, he was very ill last week that we had to send him to hospital after a week of fever. Most people including my full of experience ma said that Aqeef is missing his daddy very badly. I wont tell others but me too. It’s impossible to not missing him especially when we are away from each other. Even when we are near, I mean become a pair of close ‘housemate’,but I had to go for class and abang of course had to work, I missed him deadly that I want to go home quickly to see him. I told abang about this and abang said, ‘takpe HALAL’. Haha. That’s how abang handles problem that comes around. Even I know deep in his heart he is missing us, especially Aqeef. He said sometimes he feels like crying seeing Aqeef’s things around the house. And I reply I cry when I see Aqeef’s face because he has a very large amount of daddy’s look.

I was on a hiatus for quite long. Reason? (10 marks)

• These previous months I hate anything related to internet, computer and any other gadget. I feel dizzy each time I try to use them. Some know why, but iI would like to keep this reason secret for a while.
• I was very busy with my holiday. We haven’t go back to Malaysia almost 9 months so this time it is a big thing even it is quite incomplete without abang.
• I spend everyday of my holiday eating everything I craved for when I was at London. So much time spend for food, less time for anything else.
• I want to spend more time to see Aqeef grows up. He is 1 year and 1 month old now. With every day passes quickly I feel that it is an injustice for him to share my time doing something else more than to look after him.
• I am quite busy with preparation to enter my final year of study even I am on my holiday.
• I am an easily irritated person now. I get bored and hate people unexpectedly. To avoid being cruel and collecting more sin I thought it was better for me to take a break from internet . But don’t worry I think now I am cured slowly.

And after all this is for abang. He misses to read this blog and keep asking me to write something.

Happy belated birthday for these two apples of my eyes. Without both of you I can’t imagine how colorless my life would be. They both got a year older on last 24th and 25th February (and yes they have almost the same birthday date). I was not so well for the pass few months so I guess this is to repay my late wishes. But we had celebrated these double birthday as a family few days before me and Aqeef went back to Malaysia. Alhamdulillah for the bounty of love Allah bestows among us, we are still together as a happy family.

Last week, Friday was my birthday. Nothing special for me, birthday means an addition to the number of my age, and to act carefully as a maturer person. So everything went as usual, also, to fulfill my gedikness, I did restricted my birthday showed in my fb profile, so only those who remembered did come dropped a wish. Actually I just forgot to unrestricted it back a day before my birthday. On my birthday, I realised, tapi dah malu nak buat correction huhu, so there went my un-fb-birthday.

But I did received few wishes, from my family, my husband, and some friends. Thank you very much.

As my birthday fell on winter, so there was no outing, it’s too cold, I prefer to stay at home after school.

So that night, abang came home quite late. I already knew that this thing would happened, it just waited for the right time, because abang had several times ‘terlepas cakap’ to celebrate my birthday his way. So he came home brought all he did said. Everything suppose a birthday girl receives, a small chocolate cake (enough for 3), a birthday card, and an Ipad 2 (ok this is not every birthday girl’s)

Abang chose pink for everything, the card, the Ipad 2 cover, as if I am really a pink addict. I am not so actually.

Except for the word worship, everything was perfect!

Suamiku yang gigih mengambil cop tangan bayinya. I know how hard it took, because knowing Aqeef to get his palm stamp is harder than to get Maher Zain’s autograph. His hand never sleep!

The Ipad 2, inclusive Aqeef’s camwhore as wallpaper.Thank you abang.

Time ni baby ni merajuk dah sebab lama duduk atas booster seat tapi mommy belum bagi kek lagi.

Dapat kek terus senyap. He knows that before eating he has to recite prayer, but he has no idea that we should not eat using both left and right hands.

So thank you abang for celebrating my birthday, thank you Aqeef for coming into mommy’s life and make it wonderful, thank you to my family and friends for the warm wish, thank you mama for giving birth to me, sacrifice every thing for her stubborn daughter, thank you ayah for rising me up, until I become who I am today and next, and most of all thank you Allah for this bounty of sweet life.Alhamdulillah masih diberi nikmat bernafas di atas dunia.

Today,Nov 14 2011 at the age of 8 months and 3 weeks, he said his first word. It’s MOMMY. Mommy everyone, mommy, and it’s me. His first word shed me into tears. I repeatedly asked him to say it again but he refused then. I could hear it clearly, he said mommy when he was crying after accidentally banged his head on the music bench. To me it was like he was saying “mommy I am crying, and I need you”.

I knew I was not wasting my time taught him to spell what is written on the cheap T-shirt I bought that he is wearing today, mommy is gorgeous. Even he didn’t say mommy is gorgeous but he said mommy. A big move for me.

He turns 8 (months old) today.

It has been 218 days since he comes and enlighten my life, gives me a special title, which Rasulullah PBUH said my priority is triple than my husband.

He keeps growing that me keep worrying if I don’t spend enough time of babying him.

He learns new thing everyday that sometimes shed me into a deep in heart tears that I can’t imagine one day I have to let myself understand that he is not my little baby anymore.

He discovers new ability everyday, every time that wonder me if one day he may don’t need me to be around in his new world.

Aaah I can’t help myself from a saddened weeping. He is my lil baby, every while, always. And he is still.

Happy Birthday darling.

So well, we have 3 anniversaries, this is our knowing each other anniversary, then our engagement and third to our special wedding (the loveliest of course). On this very date 9 years ago, my family was blessed to know a humble university student. We applied silaturrahim, so that my family can help this young man who is an orphan since he was 5. Alhamdulillah that Allah gives us the chance to tighten our silaturrahim, by tying us in this marriage knot. Now it’s already 9 years since we know each other, and what makes it so special because this man my family and I knew 9 years ago since I was an 11 going 12 is the same man I’m married to now. He’ll be the one and only insya Allah. Alhamdulillah for all the bounty of sweetest love Allah bestowed among us, plus the presence of our little prince Aqeef Afwan that sprout peaceful enthusiasm to maintain and deepen our heart toward each other along this long journey called life. I’m glad and happy that now we’re proudly pronounce as a pair of husband and wife.

Mommy and Aqeef went to the halal bakery yesterday, mommy chose the cupcakes and Aqeef chose the meringue (but sadly he still can’t eat them yet). Can you see ‘SHUKUR’ and ‘FARA’ on the meringue? If you can see them, then congratulation!

Thanks abang for everything you did and you’ll do for me. For every sacrifice you paid and you’ll pay. For every kind word you said and you’ll say. For every du’a you made and you’ll make. For every hardship and happiness that we shared and we’re going to share next. I love you for whoever you are, not because you’re ‘super intelligent’. I love your humble words, I love your humble deeds, I love your humble self. I love to give my love for you. I love everything about you. Thanks for accepting my weakness, thanks for completing me. Thanks for being my better half.

(err thanks too for not ignoring my studies, for always believe that I’ll someday become a doctor and get my double degree)

Your wife,
Norfaradina Binti Ab Ghafar

We have this routine, every night mommy and daddy take turns to read bed time stories for Aqeef, putting aside the fact that sometimes after the session Aqeef’s eyes still freshly open, and we have to repeat the story again for twice or thrice to persuade him to sleep. But he already knows that’s the time for story telling so he pays attention. O how fast time flew, it feels like it was yesterday when I was pushed into the labor room and now Aqeef already can react when stories from Al Quran is recited to him. And one day I’ll reminisce and the day when he was born had already become yesteryear. Time do elapsed.

Sorry for the too many pictures. I’m such proud of my baby and my dedicated husband! Aqeef has diligence inherited from daddy.

Beliau sangat tekun.

Mempunyai ciri-ciri tokoh pembaca nilam bagi parlimen plashet grove…oo daddy this story surprised me a lot……cerita suspen ni.

Eagerly waiting for daddy to move to the next page.

Mengembangkan lubang hidung ketika membaca merupakan kegemaran beliau.

Ooo daddy,, read again, read again.

But tend to easily gets distracted by mommy hahaha

Focus changed to mommy’s camera.

Daddy, please shoo this camerawoman, she’s disturbing me!

Fuhhh…Finally, a stripey short for my little boy. I’ve started to work on it since a day before his 4th (months old) birthday, and it takes a week to finish. A tortoise mommy I did! But it’s too impartial to blame me for my overly abundant, this little guy has a strong taboo to see his mommy touching her sewing machine. He does many tricks to change my attention from my sewing machine.This short really a nostalgic thingy indeed. When I was a kid, me and my younger sisters had many this kinda short. We called it as seluar cukeng. I had one stripey like this…hmm or it might be my sisters’s, never mind. I remember we used to fight and snatch and steal them from each other. Even they were supposed to be shared. The fight would usually ended up with me lose and crying and my sisters as the winners because they are twin, and they cooperated to fight me. At the end of the day, mama would interfere and solve our problem by dividing the seluar cukeng one for each of her naughty daughter. If it wasn’t enough for three of us, she would find another. Her usual clause “bontot ada sorang sepasang je. Seluar pun kena pakai sorang sepasang tak payah nak rebut2″…Huuu..Now we don’t wear them anymore. Might be mama has threw them all.

However, this is as for now the first seluar cukeng for my little boy, mommy made!

Please forgive my very little model. He can’t do catwalk yet!